My Week at the Glasgow Women’s Library

In which, I, Megan Neilly, tell my experience of my week at the Glasgow Women’s Library, and the ups and downs that came and went with it.

The First Day – 16th October, 2017

My first day at GWL! I was initially introduced to a complete whirlwind of people – sorry, women – whom all made me feel like I’d known them their entire lives. It was a Monday, however, and it was 10 o’clock in the morning, so everyone tiredly spoke of their weekends and got straight to work. At this point, I felt like a deer in headlights, my heart racing as Gaby sat me down and began a conversation about my week at the library. Gaby then showed me around the extensive library, filled from top to bottom with books galore – books written by women, books made for women, and books which glorified and worshipped women. Any man that came in, I thought, would immediately be astounded by the sheer number of women surrounding him – stereotypically, something that sounds like their dream. The immense events space was portrayed as something which was used often, through the placement of the mauve pink chairs – about 20 were set up in front of a humongous projector – and equipped with some grey fluffy cushions, which were delicately placed upon the chairs – but only on every two or so, of them. Budget cuts, I figured.

We carried on upstairs to the mezzanine, a cold, pretty much all wooden area full of tables and chairs and boxes. Across from that, a tiny door led to the archive – perhaps the most sacred part of the library- which contained even more blue boxes as far as the eye could see. The floor was covered head to toe with women’s achievements – it was like my childhood dreams were coming true right there, standing in the cramped room with boxes towering over me. These, however, didn’t catch my fancy as much as the maid’s costume which rested on one of the walls that didn’t have any blue boxes on it. “Was there a play?” I shyly asked, pointing at the abandoned outfit, looking sullen and neglected. Gaby denied my claim, explaining that the costume was given to the library, and with that, we moved on to one of the library’s exhibitions of the moment – She Made the Library, which encompasses new and old through the medium of photographs – a series of which visitors to the library can witness the library’s “glo-up”, or, rather, their history, through examining photos and even getting to mark the images themselves if they happen to recognise anyone in the photographs.

I get off to work in the mezzanine, working quietly on my own in a chair that feels foreign beneath me and in a place, that is likewise, unfamiliar. Admittedly, I liked being on my own for a bit as I pull out a box of ‘Harpies & Quine’ – a 90s feminist magazine which has me laughing, yet tearing up at the same time. I decide from that moment on that I would like to create magazines such as this in the future – and in telling Gaby this, she alerts me that I can make a zine which showcases my week at GWL, while also writing in my journal everyday about the experiences I had. My personal favourite part of the mag would have to be ‘Wanker of the Month’, a column in which readers submitted the man who really got on their stickler during that month. This month, I think we all know who that man would be – I’m looking at you, Hollywood!

At 12:30pm, I realise that I am hungry after my stomach rumbles – not once, but about five times (I was too distracted by the actual reason my stomach did this, rather than the amount of times it did.) I slowly sauntered out of my hiding place of the mezzanine to the downstairs public space where women chatted amongst themselves and ate their healthy lunches, a portrayal of what I could imagine they did every day for a number of years now. My tummy admittedly walked me out of the front door and to the double doors of Greggs, across the street. I return only ten minutes later to sit down at a table I feel uncomfortable to eat, never mind speak at, and quietly consume my unhealthy, calorie-filled lunch. The atmosphere, to me, felt so off, that I even produced my copy of The Catcher in the Rye from my backpack and read a couple of pages before retreating upstairs stolidly, a prisoner in my own mind.

The day goes by slowly, like a snail with something heavy on its back. I sit, alone, at a table, with a laptop, and eagerly look up feminist magazines, and just as eagerly read through an array of articles which grab my interest. All of this means I’m finding inspiration, of course. 4pm comes in a rush, almost too quickly as I get engrossed in yet another article, and as Gaby kindly guides me to the train station, I say goodbye to my first (and last, as I thought) day at the Glasgow Women’s Library.

Day Two – 18th October, 2017

My second day was arguably the best, despite the ever-so emotional beginning: as if my life were a movie, I timidly approached Gaby’s always friendly face just to burst into tears. She quickly guided me to a seat, where I sat down and told her – amongst hushed gasps for breath – that I felt uncomfortable, due to the new and foreign situation I had been placed in. She reminded me that the women’s library wasn’t just for them, that it was for me too, which is something I feel should be highlighted throughout this post: the Glasgow Women’s Library is not just for the collective group of women, but it is also for each individual woman who ever visits the library – it is your library.

After the first (and thankfully, last) emotional breakdown of the day, I was given the task of finding teenage books written by women that appealed to me most – and thus, that is exactly how I spent my next two hours, with my head in a laptop – I felt like I had finally joined the club of laptop-lovers in the library. Ironic, huh? Being surrounded by books and books yet spending all of your time on a laptop. Suits me, anyway – the conversation died to the dull hum of the computers working their magic, and I finally felt comfortable and content with myself and my surroundings.

I worked all the way to 12 o’clock (I know, groundbreaking), and finally ate lunch around 12:15. Albeit, it may have been on my lonesome, but I definitely felt much better than the day before when I had to experience awkward conversation amongst others. After this tremendous amount of working I had done, I felt that a well-earned walk was indeed needed. However, I didn’t anticipate that I would be out walking for two full hours in the freezing cold!

The Glasgow Women’s Library Heritage Walk of the East End was a wake-up call: not just for me as a consequence of the weather, but also as a consequence of how much women’s history that I hadn’t discovered before, despite it being centred around my very own city. The walk was made even more interesting by the constant chatter from our visitors and also the speakers (and arguably the most knowledgeable people there), Esther and . The Heritage Walk took us from the cosy warmth of the library to the likewise to the Arctic conditions of the outside world of Scotland. I won’t give too much away on this post, as I would rather you experience the walk – and the cold – for yourself, but my absolute favourite part of the walk was the People’s Palace, and our introduction to the celebrity cat, Sister Smudge. If you want to find out more about this famous kitty for yourself then you should go on one of GWL’s Heritage Walks!

Back to the library we marched, with everyone else’s heads in the air, breathing in the fresh air, but with my head buried into my jacket as much as possible, eager to get some warmth into our bodies once again. The end of the day came quickly, as usual, but this time, I was extremely happy that I had gone back for another day at GWL, and I knew for certain then that tomorrow, I’d be happily trotting through the doors once again.

Third Day – 18th October 2017

My third day could be compared to that of a cake – short, and sweet, and filling. It began with a meeting – this meeting was known as the Big Team Meeting, where everyone gathered around The Hub to discuss matters which needed discussing. I’d anticipated it would take roughly fifteen minutes, but in reality, it was almost 12 o’clock before the team broke apart to do their twenty minutes of tidying… which then turned into about seven minutes of tidying. Something I learned about GWL, in that moment, was that they were downright terrible at estimating time.

Gaby set me to work as usual, by firstly teaching me how to contact publishers with the books I had researched the previous day. Lunchtime turned to Bake Off chat quickly – GWL are big fans of Bake Off – and then so forth went I, initially having my well-earned lunch (despite not doing anything that morning), and then spending a gruelling two hours with my eyes fixated on a laptop screen. These emails didn’t go through without me making a few minor errors, of course, of which I then fixed accordingly and thus I had finished my work for the day, miraculously.

The day was short and as always, the ending was quick: I briskly walked, once again, to the nearby station, and was actually – finally – looking forward to another day in the office.

Fourth Day – 19th October 2017

On the fourth day, I decided to extend my helping hand into helping GWL’s social media, and also into helping staff set up for the event that was on later that evening: Black Women’s Voices. Hannah set me up straight away with GWL’s Twitter – yes, I was working very hard, thank you for asking – and I decided to greet the 10k plus followers with a simple welcoming tweet, mentioning who I was and why I was tweeting. Within minutes, a flurry of people I didn’t know or recognise began to tweet back, welcoming me and wishing me a happy Thursday, also. I felt like a mini celebrity! GWL’s Twitter had blown up at the tip of my fingers, and so I carried on tweeting sporadically throughout the day in order to appeal effectively to my eager audience. In hindsight, I had probably drilled it into my own head that I had people awaiting my every tweet to like or retweet or even reply to me, something of which I had pretty much dreamed about ever since I first started my very own Twitter account in 2012.

I decided then that I officially loved working on social media and in such an environment where I felt content to display myself as who I am. I have always found that, no matter how stupid this sounds, that I can express myself much easier and better through and on social media, and the amount of love I had received despite only posting a single and simple tweet really encouraged me to try my best on social media – as silly as it sounds.

After the social media mayhem of that morning, I set off to writing up bits and pieces of this here document, recounting my experiences of the previous days and practically reliving them through my writing. The day ended pretty quickly, again, with myself helping to set up for our event that night and soon enough, I went home once again from another day at the library, which soon became something I loved being at and contributing to, rather than something I deeply worried about – my progression was finally in full swing into loving the library once and for all.

The Last Day – 20th October, 2017

And that leads me to now. Today is my last day, and I am feeling incredibly bittersweet. GWL has made me learn and realise so much through not only the good experiences, but also the more negative experiences that have occurred throughout the week. You wouldn’t think that much could happen in a week, but for me, I have experienced a whirlwind of emotions throughout this week that has made it so that no other week has compared to it. (By this point, I think I’ve said the word ‘week’ too much.)

It sounds funny to say it, but sitting at the big round table amongst women who also have their heads buried in laptops has genuinely helped me – I’ve gotten, even from just from spending five days here, a much better grasp of my skills of communicating (and what I’ve got to work on in order to better myself and my talking/people skills!). The GWL have had to put up with me for this week, which (although I brought in cake to essentially bribe them) overall must have been a hard job. I cannot thank them enough for all they have done for me: in terms of flexibility, perspective and overall, kindness.

Cliché as it sounds, my week here has been somewhat of a journey, and I mean that in the simplest and purest form of the word. It’s almost true to say that just like women throughout history, I too have struggled in order to come to my highest point of achievement: this, for me, being finishing the week, whereas for women throughout history, it’s a little bit more significant. This week may not have been impactful to society as a whole, unlike women, but it has truly taught me that if I put my mind to something, I can do it without a doubt, and to always keep going forward. (The clichés are incredible today.) Despite the uncomfort I first felt, despite the fact that I did not want to go back to the library at any costs – going back and pursuing something I have wanted to do for a long, long time impacted me in the best way possible: I have not only realised some of my flaws, but also my strengths, and that overall, just like women, if I put my mind to something, I can do it.